Thank you so much for the service we received at your dealership today by a service assistant who shall remain nameless. He was very efficient at turning my wife away in the rain today with her dead windshield wipers 30 miles from home. I was so pleased to hear you had such courtesy as to check the fuse. That was really a valiant effort on your part. I heard to that you also even managed to lift the hood and point a flashlight toward the wiper motor. That is a true demonstration of your technical skills. But I really admire your ability to quote the repair at $400 to $600 because the wiper motor would have to be torn down and inspected because what she was experiencing was a very rare problem. I also appreciate how you made my wife and 6 year old daughter risk their lives to get back home without the windshield wipers functioning, that really gave my family a lesson in bravery, I hope to return the favor to you sometime in the future. Unfortunately, that scam on my computer they call "The Internet" had some sort of urban legend that this problem is common. And that by removing the wiper motor cover (with no tools even required! HoHo!), the problem is probably caused by a loose bolt on the wiper motor to the wiper arm mechanism. Gullible "Me" tried this silly hoax, and incredibly, I was able to perform the same $600 operation you could. I promise not to let the secret out (except maybe for writing a letter to your Service Manager, BMW USA and post this message wherever I can on the internet). And in the future, should my car break down in front of your dealership, I will proceed to push it 11 miles uphill to the next BMW facility because I probably need the exercise.
Yours Truly,
Jack Brown
Yours Truly,
Jack Brown